Radical Avenue

President Lyndon Johnson presided over a tumultuous period in US history. Protests over the War in Vietnam divided the country. And Johnson’s bull in the china shop personality didn’t exactly endear him to the American people. Mrs. Johnson on the other hand, left behind a legacy of natural beauty that will last for generations.

Lady Bird Johnson spearheaded numerous efforts to create and maintain nature preserves alongside American highways. The former first lady would have admired the trend of recapturing green space in our towns and cities, most noticeably through sod roofs.

City Hall
The city of Chicago has saved about $25,000 in energy costs since installing a 20,000 square foot sod roof on top of City Hall five years ago. The Windy City is also home to a Center for Green Technology, the Chicago Climate Exchange (CCX) and the Chicago Climate Futures Exchange (CCFE).

Hospitals
The Ronald McDonald House of Austin, Texas recently received the highest level of certification from the United States Green Building Council. It has a sod roof which mitigates the “heat sink” effect and provides a quiet area for outside seating. And the building’s solar panels produce enough electricity for half of the 30 rooms.

Most hospitals use a central air conditioning system which re-circulates the same air throughout the entire structure. This poses problems for a building full of sick people. In the Austin Ronald McDonald House however, each room has its own ventilation system, so indoor air stays fresh.

Universities
Kansas University decided to preserve precious above ground campus real estate by building their new athletic facility into the side of Campanile Hill. The roof of this 80,000 square foot structure blends comfortably in with the surroundings and students can still catch a nap on the grassy hillside.

Pakistan
Stepping aside graciously just doesn’t come naturally to politicians. Pervez Musharraf’s resignation as President of Pakistan signals a new era for that country, perhaps to a more democratic, less authoritarian rule.

I suspect that most Pakistanis are relieved to have witnessed a somewhat orderly transition of power back to civilian authority. Raucous political fights are generally preferable to military coups.

Bolivia
The struggle between Bolivia’s new President Evo Morales and his political opponents over the distribution of wealth from the countries’ natural resources shows no signs of abatement. A twenty four hour general strike and rioting in states which oppose Morales have added to the tensions.

Bolivian police used tear gas to break up demonstrations in the eastern city of Santa Cruz. It’s difficult to see how Morales can govern effectively under these conditions even though he did recently survive a recall election.

Paraguay
While President Fernando Lugo of Paraguay enjoys greater support in his country than Morales, he also faces a variety of pressing problems. Paraguay’s new government under Lugo hopes to re-distribute farm land that was given to friends of the former dictator Alfredo Stroessner. Stroessner’s cronies were rewarded with around 20 million acres of land during his thirty five year rule. Paraguay’s new leaders won’t get that land back by simply asking.

Lugo hopes to also fight government corruption and improve living conditions in his country. While Lugo has many challenges, Paraguay’s peaceful transition away from a political party that has dominated the nation for decades is another positive sign for this region of the world.

The forecast calls for increasing wind power production in the near future. As a ridge of high pressure builds over cash strapped municipalities, utilities look for answers in gusty conditions out on the open prairie.

Expect some low grade disturbances as the dig it up and burn it crowd urges us to turn our backs to the wind. But for outdoor enthusiasts who enjoy a refreshing breeze, tomorrow looks like a good day for sailing.

Big Wind
General Electric understands the changing political climate and has invested in a variety of wind harvesting projects. The company recently announced its intention to spend $141 million on a wind farm along North Dakota’s border with South Dakota. The wind blows relentlessly on the Great Plains of North America.

New wind turbines rising up in West Virginia will supply electricity to Columbus, Ohio over a period of at least twenty years. Now that meteorologists have been tracking wind speeds for decades, scientists can accurately predict how much power a turbine will produce over the course of its lifetime. There’s no chance of the well running dry. Purchasers of energy love predictability.

Small Wind
Wind turbines designed for homes, farms and small communities are also gaining popularity in the US. Small turbines benefit the entire country by allowing individuals to lower their energy bills, take stress off the electrical grid and reduce greenhouse gases.

Isolated hamlets on the Alaskan frontier typically get by without incoming power lines. These towns rely on fuel shipments to survive in the winter. Small wind turbines give remote villages a level of autonomy which they have never enjoyed in the past. Wind works for America.

In order to chastise our European allies for failing to support the US invasion of Iraq in 2003, former Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld said this:

Germany has been a problem and France has been a problem, but you look at vast numbers of other countries in Europe, they’re not with France and Germany on this, they’re with the US. You’re thinking of Europe as Germany and France. I don’t. I think that’s old Europe.

Mr. Rumsfeld must love the Republic of Georgia, which sent troops to fight alongside US soldiers in Iraq.

Last week our former Cold War adversary Russia invaded Georgia, a move Rumsfeld’s old boss considers unacceptable. Russia has completely ignored President Bush’s call for a cease fire and has left the US looking like a paper tiger.

NATO Weakened Under Bush
Russia would never invade Germany or France. These countries belong to NATO. NATO was established to protect Europe and the North Atlantic. An attack on one member triggers a response from all other members.

While Russia is in no position invade a NATO country, Georgia is another story. The United States has no long standing obligation to defend the Georgian borders. That’s the difference between “old” Europe and “vast numbers of other countries” in Europe.

Bush and Rumsfeld’s cowboy diplomacy has left the US in the worst possible position. We’ve insulted our old allies and failed to protect our new friends.

Putin No Friend of the US
The problematic outcome of Russia’s war in Afghanistan twenty years ago undoubtedly lead to some consternation for the Russian military. Hard line Russian politicians have probably been itching for a chance to give their troops a shot at redemption. Also Georgia is of tremendous strategic importance to oil companies. Sound familiar?

Far from being rejected by the Russian people, this military operation in Georgia will trigger nationalist pride and strengthen the hand of the Russian politician who ordered the invasion. George Bush looked into Vladimir Putin’s eyes and saw Dick Cheney’s soul. No wonder they get along so well.

As Paris Hilton’s presidential campaign gains momentum, we’re beginning to learn more about her plans for energy independence in America. Her platform calls for additional offshore drilling only as a stopgap measure while we concentrate our investments on renewables. This prudent, bipartisan approach will appeal to legislators looking for compromise on an important issue.

John McCain’s energy platform was written by lobbyists for Exxon, Shell and BP. He’ll set up another confrontation with his opponents in Congress and try to score some cheap political points.

Paris clearly has the upper hand on sustainable energy, but how does she stack up in other ways? Let’s take a look.

Gritty v. Pretty
McCain: Senator McCain has a strong profile when photographed from his right. That stern demeanor will surely sway voters who admire similar qualities in Dick Cheney. McCain should study Ben Stiller’s character in Zoolander for guidance in avoiding left hand turns at public events.

Hilton: Paris has been photographed from many angles and performs well under bad lighting. However her dazzling style may intimidate fashion victims like Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad and North Korean Supreme Commander Kim Jong Il. Our relations with these countries are bad enough already.

Advantage McCain

Mean v. Preen
McCain: Senator McCain is unhappy because a) he thinks he was right all along about Iraq, but nobody listened to him; b) he thinks he was right all along about campaign finance reform, but nobody listened to him; and c) he thinks he’s had it right all along about his opponent, but nobody’s listening to him, other than Joe Lieberman. Or perhaps Senator McCain just prefers to avoid discussing the major issues of our time:

• Fiscal Policy - McCain will follow the course laid out by George W. Bush.
• Foreign Affairs - McCain will follow the course laid out by George W. Bush.
• Jobs - McCain will follow the course laid out by George W. Bush.
• Health Care - McCain will follow the course laid out by George W. Bush.
• Housing - McCain will follow the course laid out by George W. Bush.
• Global Warming - McCain has embraced Al Gore’s ideology, but never mentions Gore by name as that might embarrass George W. Bush.

Hilton: Girls just wanna have fun.

Advantage Hilton

Grumps v. Pumps
McCain: John McCain is angry because he believes that the media has unfairly portrayed him a crotchety old man.

Hilton: As President, Paris Hilton would turn the United States into the woman’s footwear capital of the world.

Advantage Hilton

Paris wins by a margin of 2 to 1!

What made John McCain think that he could ridicule the woman who lives a ridiculous life? Yesterday the grumpy McCain camp released this beauty in response to the latest Paris Hilton campaign promotion:

Paris Hilton might not be as big a celebrity as Barack Obama, but she obviously has a better energy plan.

Such witticisms will surely send independent and swing voters rushing out to the polls in support of this year’s Republican candidate.

Apparently McCain has decided to run an intensely negative campaign but doesn’t quite know how to attack Senator Obama. So he compares his opponent to Paris Hilton and Britney Spears. The word “unseemly” comes to mind.

I think I can speak for thousands of bloggers, comedians, talk show hosts and Hilton publicists in offering my heartfelt thanks to you Mr. McCain. I couldn’t have asked for better material.

Paris has the Photogenetics
I don’t know how to break this to you Senator McCain, but as a crimson blooded American male I just find Paris’ advertising more, shall we say, aesthetically pleasing. Paris likes to poke fun at her own glamorous image, but remember she’s spent a little time in the slammer as well. She knows what it’s like to eat nothing but stale baloney and white bread every day for a week.

Having avoided the Washington bubble, Paris understands the everyday concerns of real Americans. And by the way, what has McCain done to promote energy independence during his fifty years in the Senate?

No Such Thing as Bad Publicity
Maybe we should call him the Silver Fox. Perhaps by picking a fight with THE pop icon of the New Millennium, McCain has elevated his own stature. Seriously, how many people had ever even heard of the Senior Senator from Arizona before Paris Hilton got involved?

Pink Is for Peace
No one really believes that Paris would paint the White House pink if elected. She respects the traditions and institutions of this great country which have allowed her to inspire so many of her followers. Who knows what John McCain might do if elected? His approach seems rather mean spirited by comparison. He undoubtedly prefers a more melancholy color pattern.

Remember when picking out a light bulb took ten seconds? You could look the other way and just grab a box off the shelf. Chances are you’d end up with something that worked. Now we have hundreds of makes and models to choose from.

After spending most of my lunch hour in front of a home lighting store display the other day, I finally settled on a lovely little three way compact fluorescent bulb. I was delighted to find that it did indeed fit into my favorite lamp. It’s curly and cool in more ways than one. I figured I had the best that money could buy. Then my friend told me that I should really look into LED lighting. It reminded me that I hadn’t talked about smart lights in a while.

Intelligent Traffic Lights
Researchers in Texas are developing a system which will ease traffic congestion by linking sensors in the road to computer controlled traffic lights. When a wave of traffic approaches a clear intersection, the computer turns the light green. The vehicles all cruise through without stopping unnecessarily. The system saves energy, reduces CO2 emissions and soothes busy motorists.

Road sensors are now also used to continually monitor freeway chokepoints and warn officials of abnormally slow traffic. Transportation authorities can then react immediately to accidents and road hazards. Quicker response times keep delays to a minimum.

Street Light Dimmer Switches
Authorities in Scotland recently installed manual dimmer switches on overhead street lights. They allow operators to dim the lamps when the moon is full. The community saves money because transportation officials now have the flexibility to reduce power consumption by turning down artificial outside lights as conditions warrant.