The Kids Unwrap their Presents
All right children, gather round and show everyone what you got for Christmas this year. Yes the presidential candidates can leave early this time. There are only seven vote shopping days left until the Iowa caucuses.
Look here’s little Bill Clinton. Bill received a set of luggage from Hillary this year. I guess she wants him to get a head start on that roving ambassador job. And Santa gave Bill a universal male to female adaptor plug so he can get turned on wherever he goes. How nice.
What’s that you’re wearing young Nancy Pelosi? “I went big game hunting with George W. Bush and all I caught was this lousy T-Shirt”. And on the back it says “Congressional Cave In Tour 2007″. Very trendy.
And who could forget the new Attorney General Mike Mukasey? This year Santa brought little Mike a Waterboard Fountain. Relax to soothing trickling and gurgling sounds. Feel the comfort of knowing that your government will do whatever it takes to keep you safe. Flip the switch and it will sing any song you want to hear. Batteries included. Well that will come in handy.
You’re next little Dick Cheney. Oh look, Dick got one of those new board games called Misunderstood. The object of the game is to completely screw the other players while convincing them that it’s all for the best. Wonderful.
Poor Larry Craig had a tough year. Santa brought him a book. “Why Bad Things Happen to Naughty Boys”. Cheer up Larry. Since you weren’t that interesting to begin with, hardly anyone will remember how your political career ended.
Bill Clinton, Nancy Pelosi, Mike Mukasey, Dick Cheney, Mike Mukasey
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